Monday, August 26, 2013

41 and feeling (gasp!) just fine!

So here I sit... taking a break from doing some house work and being 41 weeks pregnant today! ... Or so they say... I had my first "Fetal Monitoring" appointment today and everything looked great according to the tech Mary Lou.


I got to hear his little heart beat for 30 minutes

After hearing his heart beat and watching the squiggly lines on the monitor (I was encouraged that was a good sign) we got to do a bed-side ultrasound. Just a little portable one. Nothing really stood out to me on the screen except for his little spine and his foot. Which looked giant, it certainly FEELS giant. 


Warm, goopy caterpillar goodness

Apparently the ultrasound portion is to measure the amniotic fluid that he's floating around in. She also was able to check out the 'ol placenta and make sure it is still nice and juicy and hasn't shriveled up into a wrinkly-old-dried-out-dusty-prune... 


chock full of nutrients!

Turns out, my 41 week old placenta is nice and juicy! Fully effective and showing no signs of crapping out just yet! 


Mmmmmm! Moist!

During the appointment Mary Lou was telling me an indication for induction of birth would be if the fluid around him was at 5cm or less. Turns out Vanson has 10 cm of fluid to free-float around in still! Yay for staying hydrated! It makes me feel good that the environment I'm providing to my son is so healthy and good for him, gives me a sense of accomplishment that my 32 year old body can do it. When I tell people I'm 32 and a first time mom I usually get the wide-eyed, "You-must-be-high-risk-oh-my-God-shouldn't-you-be-on-bed-rest" look... Well, he's in great shape and I may not be in gladiator condition at the moment, but damnit, I wasn't in bad shape to start... In fact, here is a side by side for comparison: 


First appointment in December, most recent appointment last week.

Granted, I have some work to do after he makes his way out, but like I said, I'm really encouraged that the environment my body has been able to provide him is tip-top. Makes me care less about the swollen ankles, chest pain, and the fact that I have to roll on my side and lift myself up while wheezing and sticking my tongue out like a slob to even make a position change. Did I mention I've actually ripped underwear trying to get them on these days? TMI? 

So I guess the plan is ANOTHER doctor appointment tomorrow where I'm guessing they'll ask if I want them to check me. No thanks. I'm also assuming they'll start talking about possible induction stuff. Then ANOTHER monitoring appointment on Thursday if he hasn't made his way toward the light by then. Meanwhile, continuing to get our new house ready and start moving in (HOORAY!) and getting our current house emptied. 

In the meantime, I'm reassured that he's in great shape and I have a sneaking suspicion he'll make his way as soon as he's ready... I mean, why else would I wake up in the morning with a little bit of colostrum leaking out? 

I'm ok in here Mom! 






Thursday, August 22, 2013

Leo or Virgo??

Well, here we are coming up on 41 weeks... I was scheduled to work tomorrow and Saturday and sadly, I began FMLA now. I felt really bad for pulling the rip cord because I don't want to leave my unit high and dry but man, the other night when I got off work my ankles were the size of softballs. Ick!  I remember a few weeks back when I would only swell after a long shift... now I'm swollen all the time.


My thigh doesn't really ever end anymore.

I hear the swelling will subside after the big show. I hope so. It's pretty uncomfortable. I'm sure the humidity is not helping one bit. 

I guess at this point the doctors appointments start getting pretty frequent. I was looking at my calendar in my phone and realized I have a doc appointment almost every business day now. Holy crap! One tomorrow, which I'm sure they'll offer to check and see if I've begun to dilate and I'll say NO, then a Fetal Monitoring appointment Monday, another doc appointment Tuesday, then another Monitoring appointment Thursday. Whoa people! Could it just be I was estimated a week off? Then again, what if he doesn't wanna come out? 


Ma! MEATLOAF!

Meh, I'm sure he's right on time, on his own schedule. His movements are a little more painful, feels like he's rearranging furniture and simultaneously practicing really slow Kung Fu... like Tai Chi maybe.


Take that momma!

I almost wonder if those "hiccups" I'm feeling are really him laughing diabolically... I guess I shouldn't put it past him... he is, after all, my child. 


muahahahahahahahahahaha! 

Of course as time goes on there are a myriad of "home remedies" that can get this party started... I hear pineapple will "ripen" the cervix. It even sounds gross. "Ripening the Cervix"? I guess it just paints an awful picture in my mind. There's always doin' it too. I keep getting that advice, and so does he. It's hard when you just feel like a farm animal. 


Can we turn the lights off please?

Maybe its a blessing in disguise. We're still working on the next house and THEN there's getting this current house ready to either rent or sell, or whatever. -I need to stop thinking steps in advance, because it is really just too much to bite off all at once. 

Well... it's time to hose myself down just incase the big show happens tonight... I need to at least freshen myself up. (sigh)








Saturday, August 17, 2013

Week 40: Gimme one more week!

So I'm 2 days short of completing week 40. I was encouraged to perhaps blog a little early... just in case... so... here I am. A lot has changed in this past week. We got the key to our new place in Washington!! Hooray!!!! So while I'm being crazy pants McGee and working right up until the bitter end, Kris is up there bustin' his booty making our place ready to move in!


The girls are there for moral support.


Kris found this little gem, BONUS!

We also had another OB visit and things seem to be moving along just fine. I've come to accept my right thumb and index finger just live in a numb state at the moment. I'm really hoping I regain full feeling after Vanson is born. My dexterity at work has failed... opening pills in front of patients, I feel like the most clumsy nurse ever.


If you want that oxy bad enough, you'll eat it off the floor.

Not to mention every time I stand up, I feel this insane urge to pee right away. I think he's head-butting my bladder. And I have this sneaking suspicion, he's armed with an ice cream scoop. Certainly feels like it. Feels like he's taking that ice cream scoop and scraping it along the opening of my uterus. Not sure how he got ahold of that damn thing but someone take it away from him because that shit HURTS! 


OH GOD NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

So, because when I go to my OB appointments, it's not enough that I have to step on that scale and face the hard and fast truth that I've gained the equivalent of a pre-teen, we have to have conversations about  potentially gooey stuff in my underwear (losing the mucous plug) and a gush or trickle of water falling out of my vagina... (Kris has checked the seat in his truck after I've gotten out of it for this puddle surprise)


Bone Dry.

However, I think the ultimate loss of dignity at this point is getting handed a Patient Education handout talking about Perineal Massage. What's that you ask?! I'm glad you inquired! It's supposed to be done to reduce the risk of ripping my vagina clear to my asshole. Which, don't get me wrong, I appreciate, but didn't we already talk about this in weeks past? Not to mention, I don't consider myself a genius by any means, but I think its safe to say my comprehension skills are pretty up to snuff. So... the need for a diagram just isn't THAT necessary...


Doubles as a coloring book! 
Kids get your crayons!

Seriously though, who am I fooling? I am getting pretty damn excited to meet this little hellion that is wreaking havoc on my body. I'm getting more and more excited to see his little arms and legs flail free instead of meeting the resistance that is my belly. I dreamed that if I pulled the skin on my tummy taught I could see his little fingers. It was really freaky! Then I also dreamed that he was hungry in my belly, so I swallowed a bottle and then I could see him sucking on his little bottle under my skin... WTF? Weird! 

It is pretty exciting to wait for him though... again, the doctor also offered to check to see if I've begun dilating and to strip my membranes... I said NO. I'd like him to show up on his own terms... not to mention I really do love this anticipation... It's sort of like waiting for Christmas when you're just a kid. You know how you feel on Christmas Eve night? Unless you come from one of those families that gave a gift on Christmas Eve. 


Then you don't count, you spoiled brat. 

The rest of us had to wait, and if you did have to wait and you're like me then your little ass was in bed by 8pm because you couldn't wait for the morning!!! That's how I feel now. I mean, I want him to be at least a week late, so we're more ready in the new house, but I also really do enjoy the anticipation for him too. What does that say about me? I think it makes perfect sense for myself... I LOVE surprises, but I also LOVE to be prepared. 

I hope my little love stays put for another week at least. Then it'll be game on. For now though, Vanson, keep cozy, be well, and damnit, drop the ice cream scoop already.


xoxo












Monday, August 12, 2013

Week 39. Silence is golden.

This week we're at 39 and truckin' on toward our due date... holy crap. Shit is about to get real... Seriously, the woman typing these words out right now is going to become someone different as soon as Vanson is born. For some reason that is totally blowing my mind right now...


Such a trippy feeling...

So... I've also been holding onto a little gem... I think it's safe to break the news now... we've found a home in Washington. Looks like we'll close at some point this week (Just in time for Vanson to be due) and then we'll move and get the home I own ready to sell. Not to mention this home in Washington needs some work. It's important to think of these things in small bites because let me tell you... thinking about all of this at once is a little overwhelming... 


pretty much.

Moving right along... I think what I'm going to choose to focus on right now is being excited to get Vanson's nursery ready and getting our bedroom ready. Speaking of which, I got Vanson a little night light... and ok, fine, I got a nightlight for ME. I realize he won't actually need/use it for quite sometime, but damn its cool! It's made by a company called Boon and it has these three little columns that light up and change colors with these glow in the dark balls that sit in them. You can take the little balls out of the columns and they glow on their own! It's SO cool!!! Check it out:


I set it up in the store because the ladies wanted to see how it worked.


Cycling through the colors in the dark


Glowing Balls! 

So, as the weeks go by and Vanson's time in the womb is getting shorter and shorter I've noticed a couple of things... he's dropped for one. I tell ya, I've never even imagined what it might feel like to get my vagina sucker-punched from the inside (because why would I?) but let me tell ya, I now know what that feels like. 


He's a black-belt I swear.

Also, I'm back to being really tired again. Yesterday I napped twice AND slept all night. Here it is 9:30 pm and I'm already looking forward to hitting the hay. (I'm so proud of myself too because I didn't even nap today!) --my my how things have changed already. Also, strangely, all I want is silence. I want things to be quiet and calm. I'm not sure if this is coming from some animalistic part of me that knows quiet will soon be a thing of the past... but all I want is a calm, quiet environment. 

On a serious note though... I am getting a little freaked out about how all of this is going to go down. I realize women birth babies all the time, I get that. But I also get that sometimes things don't always go as planned, sometimes things aren't as easy as they should be. I don't want anyone to have to be elbow-deep in me... The focus of course is that he arrive safely, and hopefully that means he just slip 'n slides on out.


Weeeee!!!

Did I mention tomorrow is our first anniversary? Did I also mention my husband asked me if we had anything going on because he wanted to go fishing? (sigh) He then realized that probably wasn't a very good idea and added "I don't have anything sweet planned for you." 

I'm going to bed. 













Monday, August 5, 2013

Just sit there and look pretty.

Well well well... week 38. Did you know 38 translates to "Water Retention" in Latin? It does. My engagement ring has relocated to a necklace, but I'm still able to get my wedding band on and off. Although lately with mine and my husband's temper tantrums maybe that should go on the necklace too...


I'M GETTING THE GROCERIES, PAYING THE BILLS, AND DOING THE LAUNDRY ALL AT ONCE! HELP ME OUT!!! BLLLAAAARRRGGHHH!!!

Meanwhile he's all:


IT SUCKS TO BE AROUND YOU WHEN YOU'RE LIKE THIS!! STOP BEING SO DEMANDING!! I DON'T WANNA TALK TO YOU OR BE AROUND YOU!! 
BBBBLLLLLAAAAAARRRGGHHHH!!!

Then I'm all:


You don't like me! You don't love me! I don't know if our marriage is going to last! 

Then he's all:


...

We can't be the only couple that has faced this... I'm pretty sure I wasn't like this before. I was doing some reading in my science-y pregnancy book and it was talking about how there is a surge of hormones yet again at the end of pregnancy. Great. Hormones. You bastards. I'm excited for them to even the hell out so I can be all:


Yeah right. I'll NEVER be like that... 

Anyway, as far as V goes... I'm talking about Vanson here, not my vagina... he's estimated to be around 7lbs now. That would explain the constant pressure I feel "down there". I'm tellin' ya, sometimes I sit down to pee and I actually feel sore. TMI? No, no, no... if you're reading this, you know by now there is no such thing as TMI with me. Makes me wonder though... am I dilating already? Or is he just starting to settle? I don't think he's dropped... my ginormous belly is in the same spot I'm pretty sure. Although I will say this... my belly button is NOT poking out... but it does resemble a small butt hole. I was getting ready to shower and caught a glimpse of it in the mirror... Usually when I turn I try to shield my eyes...


that is NOT me I see in the mirror!!

But alas, it's true. I had to tell the people I work with, of course, because it's a new discovery. And I didn't want to suffer alone. OK fine, not only did I tell them... I showed them... and now I'm showing you guys because now I don't want them to suffer alone...


*shudder*
See those tiny little hairs too? Insult to injury...

I have never been more thankful that the majority of my body hair is blonde. I've heard women say, sometimes ladies get a "happy trail"... What the hell?! That's not a "happy trail", it's a trail of tears lady!

On a lighter note, seems Vanson is seriously learning some kung-fu or something. He's starting to throw out knobs. Actual, little round knobs I can grab... The first time I saw it I was lying on the couch and Kris was home... I couldn't believe what I was seeing. It was the most alien thing I've ever witnessed happening to myself... I tried to snap a pic, but this doesn't do it justice:


Needless to say it's painful when this happens.

All this bellyachin'! You'd think I'm miserable or something... I guess for the most part I will say it's physically uncomfortable but more than anything it's been emotional for me. I'm not one to take things that are so monumental lightly. I hear the first year of marriage is the hardest, throw in having a baby and buying a house AT THE SAME TIME and selling two houses and yeah, I'd say that's the perfect storm for the shit to hit the fan. The question is, can we weather the storm?